Cats and the Joys of Babysitting

I can think of better ways to spend my summer afternoons than singing songs from Andrew Lloyd Webber's 'Cats'. Unfortunately, I haven't the energy for most of them. So it came about that last week, Kiki and I were closeted in the box room, singing 'Old Deuteronomy' in faux operatic style at the top of our voices. I say 'closeted' because we didn't want anyone to hear us. We failed to realise that we were sitting right next to an open window. The neighbours must think we're nuts.

But NOTHING (cooking, grocery shopping and doing miscellaneous chores don't count) is worse than babysitting. We were informed on Sunday, that the Three Varmints (a.k.a. the Gruesome Twosome and their baby brother) would be coming over on Monday morning. Cue the groans and (in Kiki's case) murderous oaths. I am over the age of majority... Kiki is not... technically that makes her 'a child'... which means that she gets dragged into playing games with Varmint Major and Varmint Minor and keeping them entertained and making them jelly. All I have to do is carry Varmint Minimus around when he's cranky, feed him and change his nappy.

All I can say is THANK GOD FOR TELEVISION. Not that there weren't any fights because of it. But Kiki, firm disciplinarian that she is, quelled any squabbles by threatening to banish them to places unknown (and unpleasant). Honestly Eris, sometimes I think she could give the nuns at school a run for their money. To make matters worse, Varmint Minor decided he wanted to play outside, so we had to take shifts sitting by the front door to keep an eye on him. Wouldn't want him to get hurt now, would we?

It was then that the next door cat, Spike, got confused, ran in through the front door, went upstairs and tried to jump out of the bedroom window (what a twat). Since Kiki has more patience with cats, she had to pick him up and (in my words) toss the bugger out. Spike was brought down looking perfectly indignant and slightly ridiculous. I hate picking cats up. Their spines go all bendy and elongated and it's just gross.

Seriously though, I did feel sorry for Kiki. All I did was use the internet all day and coo at Varmint Minimus occasionally. The Gruesome Twosome ran the poor girl ragged. At the end of the morning she might have thought that this was a good idea:

Anyroad, I've finished ranting AND... wait for it... I'll be posting something new on my own blog which is here. The comment hyperlink is your friend. Cookies for those who comment.